Which is the best way to revise and combine the underlined portions of sentences 9 and 10 (reproduced below)? The chips remained a local delicacy until the Prohibition era. This is when an entrepreneur named Herman Lay popularized the product throughout the Southeastern United States.
The chips remained a local delicacy until the Prohibition era, when an entrepreneur named Herman Lay popularized the product throughout the Southeastern United States.
Combining the two sentences effectively requires the use of a concise and grammatically correct phrase that maintains the intended meaning. The word "when" serves this purpose best, linking the time period directly to the action of popularization.
Using "this is when" introduces unnecessary verbosity and disrupts the flow of the sentence. The phrase is awkward and makes the sentence less direct, which is not ideal for a smooth transition.
The word "then" implies a sequence of events but does not provide the necessary clarity regarding the timing of the entrepreneur's actions in relation to the Prohibition era. This option does not effectively convey the relationship between the two ideas.
"Which is when" adds unnecessary complexity to the sentence structure. It creates a relative clause that complicates the sentence rather than providing a clear and straightforward connection between the era and Lay’s actions.
This option is the most concise and clear. It effectively links the Prohibition era directly to the action of Herman Lay popularizing potato chips, maintaining the original meaning without added complexity.
The best revision combines clarity and conciseness, effectively linking the time period of the Prohibition era to Herman Lay's actions. By using "when," the sentence maintains a smooth flow and clear relationship between the local delicacy and its subsequent popularization, thereby enhancing readability and understanding.
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